My dog just ran away And I am feeling pretty bad I've been sneaking out at night And my parents are real mad I've been taking lots of drugs Cause they teach me not to care Yeah, I guess that's how you cheat Because life doesn't play fair My brother told me That he's gonna Kill himself tonight With a whole bottle of Prozac Or a shiny kitchen knife He said that when he is dead I'll have his Nintendo 64 And I can play all it night long Sitting on the basement floor My girlfriend told me that She doesn't love me anymore And I wish I didn't care but I thought she was really cool So I drank a ton of liquor Then I threw up in her sink She said next time use the toilet Then she offered me a drink We passed an old man bleeding on the side of the street So I got out of the car and I helped him on